Choosing Mr. or Mrs. “Right”
I recently heard someone discussing the question of “is there one perfect match for everyone?” In my opinion the answer would be no because on a planet of billions of people, what’s the chance that you would ever find that person? What if they lived in another city, state or country? What if they didn’t get the memo that “you” were their perfect person and instead chose someone else? Or worse, what if they died in a car accident? In either of these scenarios, your perfect man or woman is out of your reach. So now what?
I’d like to submit that instead of looking for the perfect person (who by the way doesn’t exist anyway), why not broaden that search and look for someone who the Amplified Bible says is “suitable and complementary”. I like to call that the “right fit”. And here’s my definition of Mr. or Mrs. “Right”:
R – Respectful. A person who honors their parents, appreciates their siblings, relatives and friends, and who respects other’s viewpoints, opinions and personality differences. Life is about honoring the blessings God has placed in our lives in the form of other humans who have a wealth of knowledge to offer and contribute toward our growth and maturity.
I – Integrity. The mark of integrity is what you say and do when no one else is watching (or when you think they aren’t watching). Integrity is the quality of being honest and having strong moral principles. In other words, you can be trusted to be where you’re supposed to be and do what you are supposed to do without your partner having to check in on you.
G – Godly Character. Again we’re not looking for the perfect person but if you’re desiring to live a Godly lifestyle then Mr. or Mrs.” Right” should be in pursuit of that same lifestyle. As you grow together and experience life, you will both, through the fruit of the Spirit, be moving toward becoming what God, our Creator intended us to be; children created in His image and likeness.
H – Honesty. The Merriam-Webster dictionary says that honesty is “good and truthful: not lying, stealing, or cheating”. That seems pretty straight-forward and exactly what one should expect from the person that they say, “I do” to. If during the courting phase, one finds that their partner is a liar, thief or cheater, then please be honest yourself and admit that they are not Mr. or Mrs. “Right”.
T – Tenacious. Twenty-five years of marriage has proven that tenacity is necessary through child-bearing and raising, financial challenges, and just because we are two different people with different ideas, needs and desires. Tenacity says, no matter what, “We won’t quit!” We are firm, strong and can’t be easily pulled apart as defined by Merriam-Webster.
You probably noticed that these are all internal characteristics that are needed for a strong, vibrant and fulfilling relationship. I’ve been blessed to have found these and many other qualities in my husband of 25 years. We’re so glad that we didn’t choose one another based on looks or bank accounts because neither is the same as they were 25 years ago. Instead we made the choice to find the right character fit because those are the qualities to build a true foundation on.